Face it; Life with no music is boring.

However, we have this wonderful medium for expression of feelings. So here I have a few tracks that sum up myself and my life in general. I encourage you to compile a list of songs that say who you are.

Let's begin.

I Am a Pioneer

"You can't be a hero hiding underneath your bed, so we live the life we create inside our heads."

Many days I find myself being bored. Be it at home, at the store, or even at work, I constantly dream about the unattainable to entertain me. Sure it may be impossibe to experience these dreams, but some may become real. But in all honesty i love to let my imagination run wild and I get very curious about shit, so I don't hold back to where my brain wants to go. It's more fun than the TV sometimes so don't hold back.

More Than A Feeling

"I woke up this morning, and the sun was gone. Turned on some muisc to start my day. And I lost myself in my favorite song."

No real purpose to this other than to build upon previous points. However, it's an awesome song for an awesome person!

Asshole

"I'm just a regular Joe with a regular job. I'm your average white, suburbanite slob."

I seem very average by today's standards, but guess what? Just like everyone else on the internet, I'm an asshole. And I blame the internet. I find things like mean jokes and shocking pictures funny while everyone else scoffs, but do I care? FUCK NO! It's funny to me and if you don't like it, read the fuck on!

Perfect Insanity

"Come inside now I emplore. Do you think you can restore the crucial pieces missing from my brain?"

Yeah yeah, it's a Disturbed song, but please refer to previous song for my response. Now the internet made me crazy. I've seen things that shouldn't be seen and that cannot be unseen. But I don't care. It's how I am. It's warped what used to be an innocent boy into a disturbing young man. You cannot fix it, so don't try.

Hell March (Original)

"Die Waffen legt an! (Ready Weapons!)"

Life sucks. Every day is another 24 hours to our inevitable deaths. We go to work to be slaves to try and make ends meet with the pressures of life coming all around us. Is it a wonder we go a little stir crazy? No, but we march on to our inevitable end and when it comes, we're there in Hell, no matter what good you've done in life. Why not march to a bitching ass tune?

Price Of Gas

"The Price of Gas keeps on rising. Nothing comes for free."

Especially in this day and age. With gas reaching around $4/gallon last year and oil prices fluxuating and the economy being shitty, everything rises in price. Food, gas, clothing, everything. Can we keep up with this? We better find a way to cope at least before it's too late.

Summer of '69

"When I look back now, the summer seemed to last forever. And If I had the choice I'd always wanna be there."

Ahh my younger years. No responsibility, no job, no real worries. But we grow up and face the world in it's cold eyes. We had no idea what would happen later on, but I look back and think "I could have done more to make my future better." But as I approach 20, I feel I still have time. I just need to look.

There we have it. Should I add more, just check back, and build your own!

Stuff I shouldn't be doing instead actually doing anything work related.

It's time to let you in on the workings of my brain and my day at work in general. Herein lay random thoughts and feelings that are on my mind as I drudge through a long day at work, such as last Sunday. Hopefully you will learn something or get a cheap thrill out of this.

I should start at the beginning. I arrived at 1 PM to work, ready to face the day. But seeing as I was going to be alone for 8 hours, I needed to make it feel like home. This is where I decided "Hell, why not bring a little piece of me in?" Bobblehead in place, I now needed sound to kill the silence. I plug in my MP3 player into the radio. TrippFM is on the air. After hanging my keys adorned with my personal lord and savior on the shelf, I am ready for work.

Welcome to the Top Shelf. Here's your menu.

Being Sunday, an empty house is not uncommon. Hours pass by before my next order comes up. This is where we peek into my mind...

Fueled by day's old Domino's Pizza and fresh from making croutons, I reach for an extremely long oven mitt, which I sometimes wonder "Am I grabbing a hot pan or is this used to check a bull's prostate?" Rest asured though; it's used to check horse prostates.

We now move on to this mother fucker. The MICROS machine is the main link of communication between the front (servers, bartenders) and back (cooks) of the house. It sends what the customer wants to us and we make it. However, it is a Love-Hate relationship; when you're slow, its a break from the hum drums. When you're busy, it never seems to stop, especially at closing when you'd rather go home and get some fucking sleep. Alas, it is a nessecary evil that exists.

Of course, restaurants do lie. A LOT. Prime example: Chicken fingers. That is a breaded chicken tenderloin. This is a finger. Chickens do not have "fingers." When will we quit feeding this bullshit to our kids? Also, our sauteed veggies are not sauteed; theyre more like pan-fried. We are truly sorry.

The boredom continues with the soda fountain. Being the curious fellow I am, i took Pepsi, Diet Pepsi, Mountain Dew, Root Beer, Sierra Mist and Dr. Pepper into one slightly green-hued concoction. When tasted, it had a strong hit of black cherry. Write that down; only 22 more flavors in Dr. Pepper to go.

The most fun thing ever though is washing dishes.

... Oh shit, my sarcasm detector broke! Anyway, we have a 3-compartment sink to do dishes and I occasionally like to do stupid shit like this. This is a metaphor for how my life is when I work here. My life goes down the drain for all to watch and go "WTF."

Soon enough though business picks up and the night flys by. I clean the kitchen up for the next day and at 9:30 PM declare the Kitchen's Closed Due To AIDS.

So thats my thought processes when I should be productive. I now leave you with this cro-bar made out of aluminum foil ad tears of boredom.

I've taken it upon myself to make my own wallpaper, containing all I hold high and mighty right on my screen. I keep adding people as I go on and so far this is what I have below.

Who's in the picture? From left to right:

Tom Brady, New England Patriots quarterback
Phil Collins, singer from Genesis
Perry the Platypus, secret agent from Disney's Phineas and Ferb.
Venom, Spider-man's rival and archvillain.
Washu, the Greatest Scientific Genius in the Universe
Angreh Faic, famous NG emotion
Bender Rodriguez, Planet Express' resident drunk
Kirby, star warrior from Dreamland
General "Pinpoint" Townes, USA Laser General from Command and Conquer Zero Hour
Martin Brodeur, New Jersey Devils goalie

As I said I'm also trying to hone my cutting skills, as you may see around General Townes or Phil Collins theres rough edges or color left over. However I hope I can fix that. Other than that, here is what I have so far.

DOOFENSHMIRTZ EVIL, INCORPORATED!

Herein this post, lies my favorite pictures I have taken since I got my camera last May. I have decided to share them here with you in the hopes you can laugh at me.

Water Tower Place, left over from the Great Chicago Fire.
Not to far from WTP, the John Hancock Center.
The eye sore known as, The Bean.
Tribune Tower, home of WGN Chicago.
A personal fave of mine, taken on Roosevelt street south of the loop. Loop Skyline.
The Art Institute on Michigan Avenue.
Another fave, it must be the eyes.
There's many docks around Lake Holiday, but this gives me a photo-boner.
Venom struggles to understand the concept of food.
There's really nothing more scary or beautiful to me than the sight of a full moon reflecting off the pristine snow.

There will definately be more as I continue through my life, but these strike me as my favorite snapshots ever. I guess I can only get better from here on out.

Its hard to believe that I've been on this site for almost 4 years now.

Ive seen many fads, phenomenoms, and memes through those years and would like to share a bit of my journey on this site.

When I joined in the winter of 2005, when it was just a measly 17 days old, times were simple. It was pre-redesign, only 3 auras to choose, took forever to get to level 10, and a profile was nothing more than location and a few favorites. My 16 year old mind was oblivious to what Newgrounds, and indeed the entire internet would do to me.

My first BBS post consisted of saying New England would smash Philly in the Super Bowl (To which New England won 27-24 :/ ). I was a huge noob back then. I was unaware that the internet was not personal, but that it was always serious business. I defended myself at the first sign of attack and spammed pictures, much like noobs do today. I posted infrequently but remained there, going unnoticed for the most part.

I continued to deposit until I realized I was never going to level up. My last post before I left was about Weird Al on April 8th, 2006, and then I left. What happened in that time? I grew up. I learned new things. I graduated high school and went on to college. But living in the city was boring. I needed a way to kill time. So what did I do? I returned to Newgrounds, the same site I ran from one year earlier. But it was strange to me. New icons, new layouts, and an updated user page.

On August 4th, 2007, I posted for the first time in over a year. It was the beginning of the end of my innocence. The internet was my playground and I, like a small child, explored my surroundings. I became smarter and wittier. I learned how the BBS was and blended in, still feeling unnoticed. I was finally assimilated.

To date, after many bannings, I feel strangely attatched to this website, as if I hold it to be the standard over all other forums and flash sites. Sure it's hindered my social life, but maybe a new home in a new city could fix that. Until then, I will be on Newgrounds until I die.

... or at least until my friends start hating me for it.

So after fiddle-farting around, I shelled out some greenbacks to get some stuff.

For starters, I got me a red Angry Faic shirt. I went with red because I have too much black in my wardrobe. Plus the red amplifies the angry.

Second, I bought 10 Angry Faic stickers. Where am I going to put them? I'm sure somewhere at work needs a bit more angry. Hell its a kitchen for fuck sake!

Finally, my walls will be plastered with the NG Crew poster. When I frame that bad boy it will go well with my Aqua Teen poster and Tenchi Muyo! wallscroll. Just another piece of wall sex for my man cave.

Also, if you see Tom, tell him I donated 40 bucks towards his drug habit.

It was an amazing fight. As i stood on the roof, his helicopter landed on the helipad. He was standing in the chopper as it stopped spinning its rotor. We looked at each other and realised this was do or die time.

He lept from the chopper and HOLY SHIT! he tore his coat into pieces with just one flex of his torso. The fight begun.

I repeatedly tried to kick him, but he kept hitting me with knives and his whip. Then I sent barrages of kicks to his midsection. I threw him around a bit too to show him whos boss, but he was a tough fellow. He got back up and knocked me over with his devastating spin attack.

Close to death I rallied to defeat my foe. I again unleashed a hailstorm of kicks. He tried to resist my onslaught, but my reflexes were too fast. With one final kick to the face, he lost his balance and ran into the generator up on the roof. His body coarsed with electricity and he finally fell over and died.

I stood over the body of my foe. Metro City was safe from harm. This was my greatest victory.

This was my Final Fight.

Well, we've all seen them. Take picture, add funny caption, yadda yadda yadda...

I figured I'd share my own personal creations with you! Some are motivational, some are demotivational, and some are... well just look for yourselves.

Motivators
Focus
Spoils
Train Fights
Solutions
Flameshields
Cheering
Perseverance
Teamwork
Piledrivers
Challenges
Physics

Demotivators
Respect
Upstaging
Interruptions
Blowing my stack
Do it!
We do chicken,
Pwned by a chick
Your dad (Featuring theNGpro!)
Your balls
Facetable
Maturity
Get the fuck out
Overkill
Nagging
Heavenly Facepalm

Just for fun!
I know what you're thinking...
Serious business
Mornings
Your actions
Triumvirate of awesome
Belly flop!
Grenade spam
Facebook
Holy Shit!
Translation
Whatisthis?
Interest
Candle Jack
A chick holding wood!
Mons
Explosions
Censorship

NSFW!
Boners
Rule 34 always delivers
Implication

Recent events have encouraged me to create my laws that take place immediately.

1. Thou shalt respect our long-eared, big footed brethren.

2. Thou may haveth some of my carbonated beverages, but may I have mercy on thou soul shouldth I find that said carbonated beverage half-drank on the coffee table.

3. Thou shalt not complain about the weather. You can't do anything about it, and I refuse to do anything. And global warming is just when I forget to brush my teeth.

4. Your video game systems shalnt have ONE SPEC of dust on them.

5. Flatulance is fine, but save it during that big speech.

6. When I command, thou must fellate my e-penis or, if the situation calls for it, my real penis.

7. 1337speak is now an official dialect.

I expect all to obey.